Oh January...

I know that a HUGE part of the fun of blogs are the pictures...but honestly, I have none...we have continued to be pretty boring the last couple of weeks.  However, since I have gotten INCREDIBLY bad at journaling, just want to recap what little bit has happened the last couple of weeks. 

Probably the most exciting thing that has happened is Mark started his second semester of pharmacy school!  WOOT WOOT!  I know I have said this many times, but I am just so proud of that boy.  He never complains about anything, always positive, he is incredible.  Love him.

He seems to be enjoying the semester so far.  His schedule is pretty much the same as it was last semester so it hasn't been too much of an adjustment there.  He is taking one elective class, an intermediate medical Spanish class that he is enjoying.  Says it is pretty easy, seeing as he already speaks Spanish (missions are SO great for SO many different reasons!). But he just continues to plug away and is such a smarty pants.  I am so glad that he enjoys school and learning as much as he does.

OLD picture - but seriously, I love this man.  He is the only way I get through my day. 

 Things with me are far less interesting.  Mostly just trying to get back into the swing of things again, which is turning out to be harder then I imagined, but oh well, what do you do?  Pretty much every night when Mark and I are talking, somewhere in the conversation I say, "I don't know why I make plans for my days anymore..."  It has been hard that I still haven't been able to really get back into a routine yet with my health, but I keep making plans, and keep hoping that one of these days there will be a real turnaround.

I don't know if "exciting" is the best word to describe this, but probably the most interesting thing that has happened to me was this last week I had to go to the emergency room.  I have basically had zero experience in an emergency room/hospital (which I am very grateful for) so it was quite an experience.  I could go on with a great many details of what happened during the six hours of our visit, but it would probably only be interesting to a very few.  Point being, it was an EYE-OPENING experience.  I really hope I never ever have to go back.  

The reason for the visit though...The night before our visit I suddenly got very sick.  It was probably the most miserable night I have ever had to date (throwing up every 15-20 minutes...uggg).  I have had nights like this before but usually come morning I can at least kind of sleep it off - but this time I was finding no relief.  Finally I called my doctor and she concluded that I needed to go to the emergency room to get fluids.  It was a very long process.  To put it simply:  waited three hours in the waiting room (EVERY seat was filled), finally got a room, waited two hours to actually see a doctor (who's first question was "are you really pregnant?") only to leave an hour and a half later.  LONG day! 

I guess I was officially diagnosed with something called hyperemesis gravidarum.  This is just a really fancy way of saying a severe form of nausea and vomiting while pregnant.  No real surprises there. 

But me and the little one have had a lot of long talks this week and hopefully they will stop their rebelling soon.  Kids these days...let's just hope it's a phase :)

Little Peanut's 4-Month Checkup

We are happy to report that our "little peanut" is doing just great!  I am at fifteen weeks now and the little bundle is just a-okay.  We were able to hear their little heartbeat again and it is still unreal to me.  Most moments to be honest it seems so far away and unbelieveable to think that this little one is coming.  I can't wait! 

I stumbled upon this picture and it makes me laugh so I thought I would put it on.  The first time I ever give blood at my last appointment and they could NOT get it.  They poked me FOUR times!  I was beginning to wonder where they were going to go next if they couldn't get it from here!  They had to call in the special "blood taker-outer" to get enough.  The only place they seem to be able to get any blood from me is from my hands - ouch!  Apparently I am not very "vein-y." 

A Month Long Christmas

Mark and I could NOT wait to go home for Christmas.  We were so excited to see and spend some much needed time with out families and the trip definitely did not disappoint.  We were able to spend three and a half weeks in the land of Utah and it was great! 

Probably the most exciting thing was to be able to finally tell our families our news about our "little peanut."  It is so nice to be "out in the open" about our lives and the most exciting thing about them right now.  More on "little peanut" later. 

Our trip was basically divided into three different parts.  The first week we were able to spend with my family.  Unfortunately, that week I was pretty sick still.  It was really good that we didn't waste any time and told me family at dinner the first night we got there because I don't know how we could have hid it that week!  It was probably not the most exciting week as far as things we did went (because I couldn't really get around to doing much of anything) but it was nice to at least change couches :)  We didn't see a whole lot of my sisters, I think it was mostly because of work and just going about their normal lives, but we were able to spend a lot of time with my parents - which we loved!


One great surprise we got was my wonderfully creative Mom made possibly the cutest little Christmas tree for our bedroom.  She is an incredibly thoughtful and fun mom - and I think she is transitioning perfectly into "Grandma" land.  My parents cannot wait to be grandparents, little peanut was the topic of almost every discussion and it was so much fun to enjoy the "joy" together.

The ADORABLE tree my Mom made for our room!  I LOVE the storks on the top - where do you find those kinds of things?!  She did both a boy and a girl, make sure that whatever little one we have is represented! :)

 Another Christmas blessing was that I was able to feel good for Christmas day.  A LOT of prayer was said on that behalf and I felt blessed.  We woke up and had all of our Christmas festivities.  I love how my family does Christmas.  It is truly my favorite time of the year.  Mark did such a good job getting everyone's presents - and wrapping them!  And we walked away feeling very grateful for all that we received.  It is a wonderful time of giving. 

Our Christmas tree on Christmas Eve!

 We were able to go to parent's ward on Sunday which was nice just to be going to church again.  It was the first time I have been able to go to Church for almost two months so very grateful to be back again.  I will admit it was a little weird to be back again to my home ward.  I haven't been back in a LONG time, way before Mark and I were even engaged, and so it was fun to see some people that I hadn't seen in a long time.

After Church we had our Christmas dinner and then loaded up and headed to North Ogden to Mark's parents.  Keith and Jayme and their kiddos were there and it was fun to see how excited they were about all of their presents from Santa.  We had a lot of fun that night watching and participating even with the girls playing their new dance game on the wii.  It was a hoot!

Mark made this BYU fan for his gingerbread man - I must say - pretty impressive!

The day after Christmas was when things really started to get going around the Berning house.  We were lucky to have almost everyone there in the Berning bunch.  Jacob and Jenny in Michigan weren't able to come and we missed Todd the day before but all of the other Berning kids and their families were able to come over the day after.  It was a FULL house!  It is so much fun to be together though. 

We had a Christmas feast and then opened presents.  It was pretty much a free-for-all with so many kiddos around but we did share our news about "little peanut" and that was exciting.  And all of the girl grandkids got new outfits from Grandma Berning for their American Girl dolls and it was fun to see them try them on and doing their hair.  What a fun tradition!

The kiddos also put on the cutest Nativity I may have ever seen.  They did it all on their own and it was ADORABLE.  I am so grateful to be apart of this wonderful family. 

The week we spend with the Bernings was a lot of fun.  I felt better that week they had in a long time and was able to go out and do so much more.  One night we went down to Temple Square with Daniel and Teresa and Grant and Kristen and their families and it was perfect.  We went over to the new Children's Book of Mormon Museum, ate dinner at The Lion House, and saw all of the lights on Temple Square.  It was a lot of fun and I am really glad that we could do it. 

We spent New Year's Eve there and it was spent playing games, watching Jurassic Park and eating lots of chips and dip.  We are so grateful for the time we were able to spend there. 

On New Year's Day we went back down to my parent's house.  We wanted to spend some time with my Mom before she had to go back to work (since she had to work the whole week we were there before).  We were able to do some shopping and go out to lunch and I loved being able to spend that time with her.  I miss her so much already. 

We also miss this little pooch, Abby - she was our best friend all day long laying next to us. 

We spent the first part of the week going through some of my grandparent's old slides and transferring them on to discs so that the pictures could be a little more accessible :)  It was fun to see pictures of my Mom and her siblings growing up.  We had some good laughs! 

The week at my parent's was unfortunately kind of a roller coaster with up and down days for me but we were able to spend so much time with my parents and that was absolutely wonderful.  Dinner was the best part of each day just because we would sit around for hours laughing and talking and that was one of the great memories of our trip. 

We even went out to dinner one night and I think my Dad and Mark especially had a fun time coming up with truly every single awful name you could possibly imagine for our little peanut.  It was pretty hysterical.  Just for the record, we have NOT come up with a name at all yet for little peanut but it was fun getting all of the bad ones said and - I hope - gone!  Their favorite was Shanequa LaVera Berning!  Seriously....can you imagine some poor blond little blond hair, blue eyed girl living in Denver with the name Shanequa!  She would never make it! 

The biggest downer of the trip was not being able to go see some people that we really wanted to.  We really wanted to go up and visit my grandparents in Soda Springs and our friends in Logan but every day we decided to go I would get sick and we were stuck.  I felt awful and quite sad about it - I guess next time we see them there will just be three of us! 

We were also sad (and I feel pretty guilty actually) that we were never able to go back up to North Ogden also.  Starting Sunday of the next week I was just down flat and could never make the drive up there.  We missed the time we would have spent with them and we are sorry for that. 

Our trip was pushed a little bit when we checked the weather at lunch the day before we had planned to leave only to see snow and wind warnings for our travel day.  We knew that we definitely did not want to travel across the Wyoming landscape with high winds and snow so we very quickly packed and loaded up the car and were on the road by 2:00 that same day.

We did manage to stop in Rock Springs and visit Brandon and Jessi and their wonderful family on our way home.  We weren't able to stay too long since we had a long night ahead of us still, but Jessi made us a yummy dinner and Brandon showed us around the KOA there.  We are so happy for them and glad that they are enjoying their time there. 

The drive back was fairly uneventful - good good!  For awhile the storm was just right beside us looking very daunting, but then luckily we turned south just in time to miss it.  We pulled in around midnight and pretty much hit the bed sleeping.  And luckily our apartment is small that it took no time at all for it to heat back up again from our month-long absence.  We woke up to a couple inches of snow and glad we left when we did. 

I know this is an incredibly long post, probably filled with details that will matter to no one else but us, but wanted to make sure we remembered some of the highlights from the trip.  We had a WONDERFUL time and feel so blessed to have the families that we do.  We love and miss you all already! 

Our Little Bundle

Mark and I are expecting our first little one!  Our little bundle of joy is expected to come July 6 and we couldn't be happier!  We have been so excited to let everyone know our exciting news...because we are pretty thrilled ourselves :)

This whole experience has definitely been a whirlwind of emotions, as I am sure it will continue to be.  Mark and I are so happy to be starting our family together.  I love that boy more and more everyday.  We are so grateful for this little bundle to be on their way.  There are days when it truly doesn't seem real to me at all.  It is hard to imagine that another little person is growing inside of you.  What a blessing...

The only downer is that me and the little one's bodies seemed to take awhile to "get along" with each other.  I hit six weeks and I felt pretty much useless to the world.  Pretty much all I could do was move from the bed to the couch.  It was kind of a miserable experience.  Any movement at all was no fun and, well we'll just put it this way, I am fairly positive I watched EVERY movie we own (thank goodness we have a lot!). 

To be completely honest, there were definitely days when I didn't quite know if I ever wanted to do this again.  I hated having those thoughts but it is hard to keep your motivation and optimism when you've gone days without even drinking because you can't keep anything down.  It was pretty sketchy for awhile but we made it through. 

Mark was such a trooper.  I can honestly say that I never heard him complain once.  I couldn't do anything to help him with his life (no lunches to take to school, no dinners, no grocery shopping...I think you get the picture) and I felt guilty that he had to worry about preparing for his finals and take care of me.  What a guy!  He was so sweet about everything and tried so hard to help make me feel as comfortable as I could be.  I definitely couldn't have done it without him. 

One of the best Christmas presents I received was the restoration of my good health.  Ever since Christmas night I have felt so much better.  It has been such a blessing to be able to interact and just do things once again.  It has given me such a different perspective on things and I am so grateful for good health once more.  And at least now I know there is an end to the all-day sickness, weeks 6-12 = no fun, but I am completely aware that it will be ALL worth it.  I wouldn't trade this little one for the world. 

Another great early present that we received was to see and hear our little one for the first time.  Before we left for Utah we had our first ultrasound and were able to hear the baby's heartbeat for the first time.  What an experience...I don't really know how to describe it other then it was a pretty amazing.  We did have to laugh because our little one was bouncing all over the place!  To describe it in one word, it was adorable!  Maybe I won't think it's quite as adorable once I can feel them moving, but it was pretty cute watching them.  The most important thing is that our little one is healthy.  That's exactly what we want. 

Unfortunately, after we have told our family we then almost immediately have to follow up on all of the little "fibbs" we have said over the last couple months.  The biggest fib of all is my "work life."  The day after I got my job, Mark and I found our this wonderful little person was coming.  I had been feeling fine and didn't have any reason to think that it wouldn't continue.  However, within a week I was already feeling pretty queasy but it was bearable.  But after working six days - yes, I said six days - I could barely even sit up, let alone walk around to the different classrooms I worked in.  I had called in sick - with the "flu" - for two days and was only getting worse, so Mark and I decided it would be best to let them know the situation.  I wanted so badly to be able to at least go down to the school and talk with them because they had done so much for me already, but it just wasn't a possibility with how I was doing.  So I ended up talking with the vice principal (whom I had been working with mostly) and she was supportive.  She had just had her first child this last summer so understood the situation and just said to take care of me and the baby and not worry about the rest.  Such a blessing to have them be so nice about it all, but it left me feeling pretty guilty for awhile still. 

Mark and I laugh about it now, but it is funny how things work out.  I tried for three months to find a job with no luck and then I had three different positions open for me within a week.  I accepted one, and within another week and a half I was unable to perform the job!  Uggg...kind of cruddy timing, but it was an interesting and definitely "eye-opening" experience, however short it was, and I am grateful for that. 

We were able to tell our families for Christmas about our little bundle of joy.  This will be the first little grand baby in my family and the nineteenth in Mark's family.  Unfortunately, Mark doesn't have anymore grandparents on his side but I still have most of mine.  It will be the first great-grand baby on one side and the twenty-third on another.  Crazy crazy!

I could probably ramble on and on about all the different aspects of our excitement for our little one but I will close it up for now.  I am excited that we can finally talk about what's really going on in our lives once again.  Thirteen weeks down, twenty-seven to go!

Thanksgiving

Wow, I am a sad at how awful I have been about blogging this last month.  Although I must admit, there hasn't been too much to blog about.  We have just been plugging along and basically living for the time when Mark can be done with his first semester and we can go home and spend some wonderful time with family. 

I guess as far as "catching up" goes, Mark is doing incredible in school.  I just want to brag about that boy all the time.  I am so proud of him.  We just found out minutes ago actually that he got a 100% on his last exam in one of his classes!  Who does that?!  The kid is a genius.  He finished his classes yesterday and has three finals next week and then he will be done.  WOOT WOOT!  His next semester doesn't start until January 17th, so he will get a nice - well deserved - break :)

Nothing too exciting to report on my end.  I wish I had more to say, but mostly I have just been incredibly antsy to go home and spend time with our families.  I have been really lucky during the last four and a half months since we've been here to not be too homesick.  I feel lucky in that, talking to so many women that have been in my position before we left for Denver, and I was bracing myself for a lonely and kind of miserable time.  Luckily, I have been immensely blessed to have a husband that is so incredibly thoughtful and supportive and always manages to find or make time to be with me. 

Thanksgiving though kind of hit me hard.  Once we set down to (our pretty pitiful I must say) Thanksgiving dinner I was sad not to be with family and at how "normal" our meal felt knowing the feasts that we had both grown up having.  In fact, once we sat down to say the prayer, I just started laughing to keep from crying by how silly it felt.  But we concluded, things can only go up in years to come.  Luckily, I felt like I set the bar pretty low for future Thanksgivings :)

However, this year we have SO much to be thankful for.  It's hard to even imagine how much has changed for Mark and I in the last year.  For Thanksgiving last year we spent it together with my family, but we were still just dating at the time.  So we got engaged, married, I graduated from college, Mark got accepted into pharmacy school, we've lived as a married couple in three different places already, moved to a new state, Mark started pharmacy school and I got a new job.  WHEW!  That is a whole lot of change for one year! 

There has been so many "ups" for this last year.  I feel like we have been incredibly blessed.  I am so grateful for our wonderful families that have supported us in every thing that we have done this last year.  We couldn't have made it without you!  I am also so grateful to the friends that we have, most of whom we left, but we talk and think about all of you frequently.  I am also so grateful to have the plan of our loving Father in Heaven.  I certainly don't know where we would be without His guidance throughout all of these HUGELY major decisions we have made this last year and in the years to come.  There is so much peace within the gospel. 

I could easily make this whole post about all of the things I am so grateful for this year but I will save the rest.  Mark and I had planned to go up to Estes Park (the same place we had gone to visit the Stanley Hotel in October) on Friday and stay the night (NOT in that hotel though).  But Mark had an exam on Monday and we thought that maybe we should just stay home instead so he could study.

Saturday, we had reserved tickets to go and see The Christmas Carol downtown.  I absolutely LOVE going to the theater.  It was fun to go and just get away for a couple of hours, even if it was just to go downtown.  The show was great and I was glad we went.

Saturday also happened to be our nine month anniversary.  After the show, we splurged and went out to dinner.  It was nice to go out to dinner.  Again, so grateful for Mark and that we can do these things together.  Love him.

And I really hate to say it, but that afternoon was pretty much the most exciting thing we have done in a month!  We are doing good though.  Can't wait to go home on Friday!!!

P.S.  I am so irked with myself, but I haven't taken a single picture all month of anything!  So unfortunately, the story of our life is all I have to share :)

Being Prepared

For a couple of months now I have been thinking about emergency preparedness.  Especially when I would go and visit my wonderful in-laws (they have the most AMAZING food storage system I have ever seen!) I was reminded of how UN-prepared Mark and I would be if there was ever an emergency.  I always try and buy a little bit extra of certain things (mostly canned goods, and flour, sugar, and the like) when we go to the store, but I am pretty sure we are still not much better off then most.  Then a couple of weeks ago in church, we had a combined lesson on emergency preparedness and that made me really think that this is something I should probably give some more attention to. 

This is probably an excuse, but I validate myself a little bit because I know (or at least I certainly hope) that Mark and I won't be staying in this one-bedroom apartment for that long of a time.  And we lack the space and resources right now to really dive in and have a three-month supply of food, water and all of the other resources we probably should have. 

But, I can't really excuse myself for not having 72-hour kits for Mark and I - which as of right now, we don't have.  So I went online and searched for some help.  For example - WHAT do you need to have in a 72-hour kit?  I stumbled upon this blog and this lady is AMAZING!  Part of me just wants to take a tour of her house, her car, her kid's backpacks - EVERYTHING - she has emergency preparedness kits for EVERYTHING!

At first, I was completely overwhelmed.  It made me think of all of the situations in which Mark and I are totally unprepared for.  Again, I was stuck with how can we afford to get all of this stuff + where are we going to put it!  Anyway, after a couple of weeks though I have been able to navigate through a lot of her stuff, and she has helped to break it down into some more realistic goals. 

She has SKADS of lists of kits for so many different things that I think are SO smart!  KUDOS to her for thinking of this and being so prepared herself.  I want to find HER in a crisis!  One thing that I think is really great that she has done is come up with a list of things to get every month.  She has come up with these lists based on the season and what is cheapest during that time.  SMART!

Like I said earlier, the three-month supply of food is just not going to be possible for us right now.  But she does have a list every month for just three or four things you can add or rotate in your 72-hour kits as well.  This is where I am starting.  If we can afford to get some of the extra stuff on her lists some months - BONUS - but right now I am just shooting to get our 72-hour kits done.

Anyway, I just thought I would pass along her blog to you.  The completely overwhelming feeling does pass...eventually.  It has at least given me a place to start so that we can maybe be kind of  prepared in case of an emergency. 

Here's the link to her blog:  http://preparedldsfamily.blogspot.com/

President Thomas S. Monson said:  "We do live in turbulent times.  Often the future is unknown; therefore, it behooves us to prepare for uncertainties." 

Some Thoughts on the ABCs

Wow...I have had so many thoughts the last week and a half it is hard to know where to begin.  I guess first off I survived the first week and a half of my new job here in Denver - woot woot!  It has been a hard and thought provoking week.  My job has turned out to be slightly different then what I expected it to be - not necessarily bad - just different. 

I spend about 45 minutes to an hour in seven different classes every day.  It definitely makes the day go by pretty fast, however, it is also kind of exhausting in some ways too.  I am the only "para" as they call me that has this type of schedule in the school.  All of the other ones spend either the whole day in the same classroom or just split between two - one in the morning and in the afternoon.

After the first day, Mark was asking me how it went.  And you know that feeling when you start a new job or a new class and it's kind of an unknowing, nervous, antsy sort of feeling...well I got to experience that seven times  - one in each classroom!  I am in three 2nd grade classrooms, three 5th grade classrooms, and one 4th grade classroom.  And each teacher sees me in different ways, and sees my "role" in the classroom in different ways.  So I am constantly switching gears which is interesting and has definitely been a growing experience for me. 

I have already been informed that one of the teachers doesn't particularly enjoy having me around - I found this out on my second day.  What a self-esteem booster!  I don't think (or at least I hope) it is nothing personal about me, but I was told she just finds it annoying to have to come up with things for me to do in her classroom - like it is just one more thing for her to plan for.  In some ways I do understand this point of view.  Although, I have never been the formal teacher in a classroom of my own, I have had lots of experience "pretending" (I guess you could say) being the full-time teacher during my student teaching.  Your time is so limited and it would be hard to plan for another thing.  However, I do hope the at least eventually she sees that I am here to help her and not be a hindrance.

Being back in a school setting again has also opened up my mind again to how much I enjoy teaching.  There is something so fulfilling knowing that you have helped someone understand something new.  One thing that has also been interesting is that attitudes here are just different from what I am used to.  Since the last three months I have been at home, with my only real interaction with people being at church, the last week and a half have been interesting.  It just seems like a harsher world out here.  In so many ways, it really makes me appreciate where I grew up in Salem and in Draper.  Kids here, and people in general, seem to just have to deal with things that I never have, especially at such an early age.  Because of that unfortunately, it just seems like a harsher environment overall.  To be honest, I don't know how I feel about being engulfed in it everyday. 

Also, being in the school has really brought back to my attention my own beliefs in teaching.  Seeing as my role right now seems to observe the teachers a lot more, it has taken me back to what I believe a good teacher should be.  And I know I was most definitely not a perfect teacher, but I really did try my best to do some things that I felt were really important and that I am quite passionate about.  In fact, this week I have been reminded of the longest paper I ever had to write in college.  I know many will laugh at this, but my major wasn't known for long papers, but it was a ten page paper on my teaching philosophy.  I have gone back to this paper many times actually.  I wrote it in my freshman year and although I have added some things to it, it generally has remained the same. 

I believe that a teacher must believe in each and every one of their students and their ability to achieve.  If we, as their teachers, do not believe in who they can become and what they can learn, who will?  Especially being out here in this environment, it seems that the majority of your classroom is filled with students that don't feel like they have anyone that believes in them.  I believe that if you set high expectations for your students and let them know that it is because of your belief in them, that they will almost always rise up to the challenge.  Kids, especially at this young age, have not become bitter toward the world.  It is a very short window that they stay in this state, and if you can keep that confidence alive even for one more year, you have made a difference. 

Another thing I feel strongly about is working for and with your students.  Students can tell when you are working hard for them.  If they see that you are working hard to make their education great, they will work hard too.  Sometimes going that extra mile as a teacher seems completely daunting, and sometimes it can't always be done, but I believe when we do take those moments to show them that you are willing to work hard for them, they will work hard to learn. 

These are probably my two biggest things I believe the most strongly in with education.  And I truly hope that no one takes these the wrong way.  I have so many friends that are now teachers and I am sure they are wonderful teachers, and I don't mean to be sounding judgmental or anything towards teaching.  But from my current point of view, I feel like from what I have observed the last week and a half, these are greatly absent from the classes I am in.  It makes me sad to see teachers just give up on students or believe that they are just a "lost cause."  And yes - I have heard this phrase more times then I can count during this week and half.  It is incredibly hard for me to watch. 

Some things I have learned from my orientation with this school I thought I would pass along because I thought they were interesting.  Only 30% of the students speak English as their first language.  The five biggest languages spoken are: Spanish, Russian, Vietnamese, Arabic and Somali.  I do not know ANY of these!  So far, it hasn't been too big of an issue.  Most of the kiddos are pretty good about sticking to English in the classroom.  Over 80% of the students are also on free- or reduced-lunch.  It is not the wealthiest of neighborhoods if you catch my drift. 

There was a frightening experience that happened on Thursday at the school.  One of the fifth grade teachers was working late on Wednesday night when she received a very angry call from a parent.  Long story short, the call ended with the parent threatening the life of the teacher.  The next day the parent and the whole extended family of the student showed up at the school.  This particular teacher's classroom is out in the portable.  The family began using pretty much every inappropriate word you should NOT use ever (especially at a school) against the teacher.  Police came and certain members of the family were taken away in handcuffs.  This teacher was then told by the police that this family is notorious for their defiance towards authority.  They basically have all been in and out of jail and it is actually a written rule in the area, that whenever a response is needed at the home, that there must be at least three police cars present.  SCARY.  This teacher now has to be escorted to her car after school every day as soon as school gets out and is in danger.  I must say, when the teacher told me all that had happened, it made me NEVER want to teach here.  It didn't even happen to me and I was scared for her.  It is a whole new world out here for me.  One that at times, I must say, I don't really like. 

Every day I go to school, I drive down a street that Mark and I have promised we will never go down at night.  It is Colfax Avenue.  It is an extremely long and dodgy type of street.  You drive down that and you see twelve year olds openly smoking, kids that can't be older then three or four standing by themselves to take public buses, nude dancing institutions, mothers holding their babies with nothing but a diaper on in 25 degree weather.  I actually really hate this part of my commute.  In fact, there have been times when certain things I see have made me cry.  It just makes me so sad to see that for some, this is their life.  You want to help them, and yet it seems impossible. 

I realize that this probably is the weirdest and most random post I have ever written.  It is probably also the longest.  I am sorry it is  mostly just me rambling on about an array of different things, but they have just been on my mind a lot.  I hope that somehow in my job I can do something to help at least one person.  But for now, I guess just pray for these little kiddos out here.